So Bert and I spent the weekend attending the wedding of a good friend. Typically wedding comments fall into three categories (1) the bride, (2) the ceremony and (3) the reception.

With regards to the bride, she did look very beautiful – how could a bride look anything but gorgeous, but she spent a seemingly disproportionate amount of time crying. This got me thinking because, you see, our wedding was quite unemotional from the tear side. Part way through our wedding ceremony I did manage to eke out a tear or two but it was quite an effort. Does that make me a cold, unfeeling bitch, I mean honestly this girl was absolutely bawling and all I could think was – ew, her Kleenex must be so snotty by now.

The ceremony was rather uneventful (other than the bawling) and the rain let up – mostly – about ten minutes before the ceremony started. My husband looked ever so cute as a groomsman even if his tie did have pen marks on it so I spent most of the time snapping photos.

The reception was a little bit of a disaster. The food was decidedly ok, and I was promised salmon but got ‘roughy’ instead – I traded with the girl next to me for the chicken. The speeches, well I’d be interested to know if this seems strange to you. When the father of the bride gave his speech, he spent the first half congratulating the brides’ sister on her new job in Switzerland and expounding on how much he was going to miss her. He spent the second half illustrating the fact that the bride has ‘always loved the lime light’. Scattered throughout were references to the ‘tough times’ the bride and groom have gone through – in terms of their relationship, and his pleasure that the groom has decided to study dentistry because he only would only have been happy giving his daughter away to a ‘doctor, lawyer or dentist’. The other speeches also harped on their relationship challenges (the wedding was delayed twice) and the groom was rather poorly represented both in terms of speech content and number of guests. As a guest of the groom I thought this was very unfair.

Oh yeah, I almost forgot, Bert and the other groomsman kissed during the reception – a rather unfortunate incident involving a silver Hershey’s Kiss. The rather conservative, rather old crowd of guests, did not think it nearly as amusing as I did.