So today was my first official day of work (official=paid). Anyway last night I went to bed at around 11am and woke up at 1:36am.

I lay in bed for an hour and a half during which time I convinced myself, based on my acute sense of hearing, that someone-somewhere in Montreal had stolen a tank and was crashing it through the bottom floor of nearby apartment buildings.

I lay on the sofa for two hours during which time I convinced myself that a clicking noise, which initially sounded electronic, was actually a supersized rat chewing through the side of the refigerator to get to the pot of old curry we have inside.

I got back into bed for an hour and a half during which time I conviced myself that the reason I couldn’t sleep was because sub-conciously my body knew that I was going to die in my sleep and so it was keeping me awake in order to allow me to savor my last few moments on Earth.

I woke up this morning (after a quick 45 minute nap from 6:15 to 7am) and there was no widespread tank destruction, no giant rat hole in the fridge and I wasn’t dead. I was happy to go 0 for 3.

I do, however, have a good dose of PMS lower back pain combined with my first sore throat of the flu season and an odd blister on the bottom of my foot.

I put it all down to negative vibes from the people who didn’t get the job. I can’t begrudge them their small measure of revenge.

Unless, of course, I can’t sleep again tonight in which case it’s all out war!