Ok apologies for being a very erratic poster this week (I said erratic Dan, not erotic). Anywho I feel a list coming on: the 5 things I won’t miss about my job…

5. The incredibly slow boiling kettle. I swear that the whole conservation of energy thing does not apply to this kettle. Somehow when you plug it in only 10% of the energy goes to the heating coil, the rest is sucked into the invisible black hole in the counter top. Um, would a miniature black hole really be invisible or would it be black? Well that’s beside the point, my point is that it takes 7 minutes to boil enough water for one cup of tea.

4. The flickering light in my office. Every morning I come into my office, turn the light on, and am subjected to three minutes of attempted epilepsyism. To make matters worse, the first time it happened I went to the office manager to tell her about my flickering light but, by the time we came back to my office to check it out it had stopped. She gave me one of those ‘who’s flickering now’ looks before retreating back to her normal office…conspiracy…I think so.

3. My answering machine that has someone else’s name on it. Oh, the actual message has my name in it but when I enter my mailbox password I am proudly told that I am entering the voice mailbox of Lucy…who the hell is Lucy and how did she get into my answering machine?

2. The constant re-emergence of the paper from hell. Just when you thought it was safe to go back to your computer, just when it seemed that victory was nigh, it’s back. One more footnote please, one more reference, I’ve changed my mind, no you’ve changed yours…ahhhhhh.

1. My messy desk. I don’t know what it is about me, I mean I’ve never been very organized but it seems like my desk is the outlet through which I let all of my chaos flow. I try to justify it by telling myself that a messy desk just demonstrates how busy I am but, realistically, I’m not that busy at all. I am always losing things on my desk, when it’s a pen or a stapler that’s ok, but when it’s my lip balm, now that’s a five alarm emergency (in case you missed my earlier post, I am desperately addicted to lip balm).